I’ve often joked about locking my kids up (Amelia) or giving
them away (both) when they become teenagers. For various reasons, because let’s
face it, teens are by far and large not the most pleasant age group. But seeing
as how locking them up is probably frowned upon, and I’ve already put too much
time and money into them to give them away, I guess I’m just going to have to
keep them and take the teen years as they come.
Which also means you have to take the pre-teen years. The
big child turned 11 in March, which means he is officially a pre-teen. Gulp.
That also means the day I have been dreading since the pee stick popped
positive is coming. That’s right… I’m going to have to have “the talk”. Now,
honestly when he was born I thought I wouldn’t have to be involved with his
because that should be a dad job. But here I am rocking the single mom life, so
my job responsibilities include those of mom, dad, Santa, the Easter bunny, and
the tooth fairy, so….
Back up to a year ago at Braden’s 10 year old visit. They
asked me if I wanted him to get the Gardasil vaccine. Not gonna lie, it took my
breath away. Why are they asking me to have my 10 year old vaccinated against
STDs???? And then it dawned on me – some kids may need it at age 10. Then I
think I probably cried a little on the inside. But we passed last year because
I wasn’t ready to make the decision yet and because he had to have booster
shots at 11 anyway so now Gardasil for the 10 year old. Fast forward to yesterday and they
asked again. And again I had no answer. I immediately texted a mama friend in
the healthcare profession that had a boy to ask her opinion. I asked the nurse
her opinion and at the end of it all I just couldn’t say yes. Y’all – I’m by no
means an anti-vaccination mom. I’m of the opinion the more the merrier, but
there is something about this one that I just can’t get on board with yet. I
think it has to do with the fact that in order to need it my child has to be
sexually active and I just can’t reconcile that in my head with the sweet
blonde headed 11 year old boy in front of me.
Braden is a super smart kid, but not advanced in the ways of
the world. He is very innocent. He’s had a sweet girlfriend for 18 months and
they’ve never so much as held hands. Which is perfect for 10 and 11 year olds.
They see each other at theater events, laugh and giggle a lot, and that’s it! They
don’t call or text each other or even see each other at school. It’s the
perfect first “relationship” for his age. And he has a wonderful group of core
guy friends. They are all good kids and they would rather talk about farts than
girls. In my head that is how all 11 year old boys should be. But they aren’t. Some of them are doing and saying things that my child can't even fathom right now. And he's going to be in middle school next year with those kids.
Which brings me to the next part. I talked to the doctor
(outside of the exam room) a lot about what “the talk” needed to look like for
Braden. My first question was did it have to be from me? Yes... I tried to get
out of it. The doctor was very quick to say, yes – it needs to come from me.
And I get it, I am Braden’s most trusted person in the world, so something this
important should come from me. Ugh. But after that I’m literally clueless. I
didn’t get that talk. I got the girl version. My body changed in very different
ways than his will. So this whole thing is very foreign to me. Sigh. But he is
going into middle school in a few short months and all of the boys and girls
won’t be as innocent as him, so I’d like him to have the facts before he comes
home and tells me where babies come from…
That being said, if you’ve done this before, I’d love any
advice. I have gotten some suggestions from others, but none from the single
mama group yet. But honestly at this point I’ll take any suggestions. What
worked and didn’t work for you? Was it you that did it? Also, if you have
opinions on Gardasil I’d also love to hear those. Feel free to PM me if you’d
rather discuss in private since I know this is a touchy subject =) But short of
giving him away to the highest bidder, I’m going to have to do this pretty
soon. And I’d like to be as armed as humanly possible. And for fun take a
listen to the anthem of my teen years. Does anyone from BJH remember when
someone did this in the talent show one year??
